Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Why Not ME?
Let me start by saying that I am happy for my friends who are pregnant...but why not ME? I just found out that one of my previous co-workers is due in Aug. and last time I spoke to her she wasn't even trying. Like I said, I am so happy and excited for her, but it's so frustrating knowing that we've been trying for almost a year! Another girl I went to grad school with got engaged, married, AND pregnant all in the time we've been trying. I mean, really?! It's a very difficult feeling to deal with and I hate having to not be able to join them with a big belly. Today's one of those not so good ones...
Saturday, February 4, 2012
30 Days
Yay Metformin!!! I'm two for two on my cycles so far this year. I was curious as to how long it would be between them, since the first time I actually had a period "on my own" was last month. Turns out, 30 days it was. :) Color me happy! I bought a BBT (basal body temperature) thermometer so I'll start charting my temp. tomorrow morning to help see when I ovulate. This journey is exciting (right now anyway ;)) because I never know what to expect.
Monday, January 16, 2012
THE Dreaded Question
"So when are YOU going to have a baby?"
That's what I was asked several times yesterday while at a baby shower. Of course the people who asked don't know my situation, so I can't hardly blame them since Jonathan and I have been married for 4 1/2 years. But it still makes me want to scream, MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! I mean, what do you say? Oh, I have PCOS and go into a long explanation about it and all of the treatments we've tried so far? The first person who asked me, I was fine. But then I felt bombarded and was almost in tears when like 3 other people brought it up at the same time. I almost had to excuse myself to the bathroom, but I got myself under control! And I didn't want to take the focus off the mommy-to-be, because I am truly happy for her!
I can say one thing that I have learned through this experience is to NOT ask questions like this. For one, you never know what the person is going through and two, it's really none of their business. So eventually by the time I got asked this question again as I was leaving my response was, "Whenever God decides it's time."
"Wait on the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait on the Lord.". Psalms 27:14
That's what I was asked several times yesterday while at a baby shower. Of course the people who asked don't know my situation, so I can't hardly blame them since Jonathan and I have been married for 4 1/2 years. But it still makes me want to scream, MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! I mean, what do you say? Oh, I have PCOS and go into a long explanation about it and all of the treatments we've tried so far? The first person who asked me, I was fine. But then I felt bombarded and was almost in tears when like 3 other people brought it up at the same time. I almost had to excuse myself to the bathroom, but I got myself under control! And I didn't want to take the focus off the mommy-to-be, because I am truly happy for her!
I can say one thing that I have learned through this experience is to NOT ask questions like this. For one, you never know what the person is going through and two, it's really none of their business. So eventually by the time I got asked this question again as I was leaving my response was, "Whenever God decides it's time."
"Wait on the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait on the Lord.". Psalms 27:14
Sunday, January 8, 2012
At Last!
Finally...my body is starting to get back to normal! The Metformin is working (along with God!) and my cycle is kicking in. Whoo hoo! I never thought I'd be so excited for something that women usually dread. Haha :) I literally cried tears of joy and relief. Even though I had this feeling of peace and assurance that things were ok, it still felt good to have some concrete evidence. Of course we aren't completely in the clear, but it's a start. Now at least we can try again!
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Happy New Year
It's 2012, a year full of new possibilities and as far as I'm concerned, a year closer to me becoming a mommy! Still taking Metformin, 3 a day, and for the most part I am over the side effects. I've found that if I take it right after I eat and have plenty of food on my stomach, then I don't get the cramping and the nausea. Mother nature and the meds still haven't kicked my body into regularity...but I guess it takes time.
Something exciting though: Right befor Christmas, Jonathan and I went to dinner at a Chinese restaurant. We got fortune cookies at the end of the meal and mine said "God will give you everything that you want." It was really cool, like God talking to me b/c we had been talking at dinner about a baby and what we've had to go through so far and wondering what this year would bring us. I felt a comfort that I can't explain. And that night as I was going to bed, as I prayed, I felt this overwhelming sense of peace and comfort. It was like the Lord was saying, "It's coming. Just wait. I"ll take care of everything".
Something exciting though: Right befor Christmas, Jonathan and I went to dinner at a Chinese restaurant. We got fortune cookies at the end of the meal and mine said "God will give you everything that you want." It was really cool, like God talking to me b/c we had been talking at dinner about a baby and what we've had to go through so far and wondering what this year would bring us. I felt a comfort that I can't explain. And that night as I was going to bed, as I prayed, I felt this overwhelming sense of peace and comfort. It was like the Lord was saying, "It's coming. Just wait. I"ll take care of everything".
Friday, December 9, 2011
Two-a-Days
Well, I'm now taking 2 Metformin pills a day...and it's not fun. I wake up in the morning feeling nauseous and pretty much stay that way throughout the day. My stomach cramps to where I'm doubled-over in pain at times and I still have to work my way up to one more pill! I've talked to some people who said they didn't experience any side effects, but that's just how I am. Instead of "may cause...", my medicine labels should say "will cause...". Maybe (hopefully) this is a little preparation for pregnancy and the nausea associated with that. :)
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Playing Catch-Up
Hello blog world! So obviously you've figured out that this blog is my way of sharing the ups and downs of trying to get pregnant with PCOS. Let me catch you up on a few things...
May 2007-started birth control
June 23, 2007-got married!!!
**did lots of things in life (mission trips, graduate school, got a dog, a cat, and another dog!)**
March 2011-stopped birth control
June 2011-doctor's visit since I had not gotten my period, ultrasound showed my ovaries were "a little polycystic", started 10 days of Provera
July 2011-pregnancy test: one pink line (negative)
August 2011-10 more days of Provera
September 2011-pregnancy test: one pink line, back to the doctor for some blood work since my periods still are not happening without meds, 10 more days of Provera
October 2011-blood work came back "perfectly normal", at-home ovulation test shows I ovulate :)
November 2011-pregnancy test: one pink line, took another just in case: one pink line, back to the doctor and given 2 options: fertility treatments or Metformin, chose Metformin
Today- I've been taking 500 mg of Metformin now for 4 days. Eventually I have to work up to 1500 mg. My OB says it should make me get my period regularly but to give it 3-6 months. The Metformin is rough on my stomach and makes me nauseous, but if it will result in a bundle of joy I'll take it!
So there you have it, my journey so far. I do have PCOS according to the docs, even though I was first only told they looked "a little polycystic". Whatever that means. There have been a lot of tears shed and a lot of prayers prayed. Ultimately this isn't up to me or in my hands. God is in control and I know that. Doesn't mean it's easy, but it does make it easier!
May 2007-started birth control
June 23, 2007-got married!!!
**did lots of things in life (mission trips, graduate school, got a dog, a cat, and another dog!)**
March 2011-stopped birth control
June 2011-doctor's visit since I had not gotten my period, ultrasound showed my ovaries were "a little polycystic", started 10 days of Provera
July 2011-pregnancy test: one pink line (negative)
August 2011-10 more days of Provera
September 2011-pregnancy test: one pink line, back to the doctor for some blood work since my periods still are not happening without meds, 10 more days of Provera
October 2011-blood work came back "perfectly normal", at-home ovulation test shows I ovulate :)
November 2011-pregnancy test: one pink line, took another just in case: one pink line, back to the doctor and given 2 options: fertility treatments or Metformin, chose Metformin
Today- I've been taking 500 mg of Metformin now for 4 days. Eventually I have to work up to 1500 mg. My OB says it should make me get my period regularly but to give it 3-6 months. The Metformin is rough on my stomach and makes me nauseous, but if it will result in a bundle of joy I'll take it!
So there you have it, my journey so far. I do have PCOS according to the docs, even though I was first only told they looked "a little polycystic". Whatever that means. There have been a lot of tears shed and a lot of prayers prayed. Ultimately this isn't up to me or in my hands. God is in control and I know that. Doesn't mean it's easy, but it does make it easier!
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