Monday, May 13, 2013

To Be or Not to Be

Am I or aren't I? Pregnant that is. My period hasn't come yet and I have 3 HPTs sitting in my bathroom, but I'm too scared to test. I just know its going to be negative. Or could it be possible that I might just see the two pinks lines I've been longing for for two years?!? Part of me feels like my body is giving me all the signs of my period, but then I wonder if its just me convincing myself of it and I really am not having symptoms of my period.  A very small part of me is so excited and hopeful,  but I've been crushed so many times that I won't let myself cling to those positive feelings. I know it seems stupid; just take the test Jessica. That's probably what you're thinking. I can't explain the absolute fear that I feel just thinking about taking a test. I'd rather wait a few days and get my period than see another negative.

I don't feel any different though. And my progesterone was low last week. Aren't you supposed to feel different if you are pregnant? Nausea, sore breasts, and all that other stuff? So I can't be pregnant if I don't feel any of those things. Right?!?! I should just suck it up and take the stupid test...but I won't.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Baby Rollins

Lilypie Trying to Conceive Event tickers